Back to blogging

Yes, that's right, your eyes do not deceive you~ after a (not so brief) hiatus, I am back to blogging. Over the last 6 months I have certainly contemplated updating the blog, however the idea of updating all that has transpired since my last blog entry has daunted me. So I put it off and said to myself, "I'll update when I have time to recap the last few months." Well, reality has set in as I have realized that I will NEVER have enough time. So I start anew from today.
My last blog entry was written 5 days before Sophie was born. Now she is an amazing 6 months old baby. She was born Sophie Dylan (Sophie for my mom, it's the German for my mom's name Sonja~ a shout out to my mom and our Austrian heritage; Dylan for Bob...Brian's middle name is Donovan, also a singer so we just found it fitting...and I love how both names sound together), 8 lbs 9.5 oz. on April 20th, 2009. She is absolutely beautiful and has the most amazing personality. She is THE happiest baby I have ever met and she's ours, all ours!!!! We joke that her facial muscles must get sore as she is always smiling. She has slept through the night since she was 2 months old, yes, I do realize how lucky we are!!! I have posted some pics below of us and our little princess.

Sophie at 1 week old and 2 months oldSophie at 2 months on the way to Texas. Bless her heart she did awesome on this VERY long road trip. As did her big brother.

Sophie, Brian and me~ July 2009, Sophie at 3 months

Sophie at 4 months

Sophie at 5 months

Sophie at 6 months

As of her 6 month check-up she was 17.3 lbs, and 27 inches long, the size of an average 11 month old. She also is in the 95th percentile for her head, proving that the Ford head is indeed a dominant trait. All that worrying we did during my pregnancy was for nothing. Sophie is a vision of perfection.
Bri loves his sister and dotes on her as a big brother should. He has had his moments where he has tried our patience, but it's to be expected when gaining a sibling, it's an upheaval and now he has to share the attention normally reserved all for him. He's a good kid though, smart and sensitive and we are so proud of him.
I am back to work again, I went back in August. It's hard being away from the kids, but it's also nice to be back at a job that I love. It does make it easier having an opposite schedule from Steve, knowing that the kids are not with a sitter for too long.
And that's us in a nutshell. 2009 has been eventful, but I am looking forward to what 2010 has in store for us. Less than 2 months until the new year...where does the time go?

Waiting................

Here we go again...4:28a and sleep eludes me. I suppose I should get used to it, though waking up to feed a baby makes more sense to me than getting up for no known reason, other than I can't sleep.
Yes, still pregnant. 39 weeks and 4 days. With Brian coming at 33 weeks, I had no idea that my body had the capacity to be "with child" for this long. Though considering that I am carrying a girl, and I was 2 weeks late myself, it seems fitting that my daughter would repay me the favor once bestowed upon my own mother. I am so ready to meet this baby girl, already blessed with a strong personality it seems. I am ready to have my body back, to get back in shape, to not have to worry so much about the impact that everything has on my body (or rather the baby). I know I should treasure these last moments of pregnancy, seeing as though this will likely be my last pregnancy, but I am so uncomfortable that I find myself READY.
I did not have the opportunity to have a trial of labor with Brian, everything happened so quickly, my blood pressure was so high, my kidneys were not functioning as they should that my doctor made the determination that my body would not tolerate being pregnant one more day. Being at 33 weeks, there was no way for me to attempt a vaginal birth, so I had a c-section. I really wanted to try to have this baby the "natural" way (+ drugs of course, skipping the epidural may make you a hero but as far as I have seen there are no medals or recognition given for this feat, so pass along the happy medicine please!), but the closer I get to my due date, the less its looking like this will be a possibility. My doctor does not want to induce me, as there are risks for uterine rupture following a c-section, so if I get to Monday and my little baby girl remains stubborn, then it's a c-section for me. I have to remind myself that the end result remains the same and really I just want to do what's safe for my baby and me. But I find myself REALLY nervous this time. There is something about everything happening so fast that it doesn't give you any time to THINK. Well time is all I have in the wee hours of the morn as I am chasing sheeps so I have had too much time to think. And I am really anxious about all of this....I have time to think about all of the "what ifs" and the plethura of things that go wrong. And all of this anxiety puts me right back to that nervous 9 year old who questioned the dentist about all the possible risks and pain of a procedure and who was kindly laughed at by the dental hygenist and deemed a worry wart. A worry wart I am then. But by (at the latest) 10am Monday, I will be holding a beautiful baby girl, introducing her to her proud big brother. So that makes all the discomfort, pain, and worrying totally worth it.

For anyone interested...a follow-up from a very sad example of what happens when ignorance, hate, and extremism meet. It was a case I was following and I stumbled across this update...

Unitarian Universalist Congregation shooting in Tennessee

And finally....an update

I have become a terrible blogger...I can't believe that it's been a month since I have updated this blog. So much has been going on. Our Brian has picked up every cold and flu in a 10 mile radius since he started preschool. Being the sensitive, giving child he is- he decided to "share" the flu with his mommy. Ironically the one person who did NOT get the flu shot in this household, was spared the flu. Steve never gets sick. So unfair. After I started feeling better, about 4 days after I got sick, I got a upper respiratory infection/bronchitis, and right at the end- a stomach bug. It was a lovely week (well almost 2 really)...But now Brian and I are feeling much better.
The baby is getting huge! I am now 32 and a 1/2 weeks pregnant. I'm starting to have some ligament and pelvic pain and pressure and honest to God thought I was going to have to deliver her in the bathroom at the office on Monday. That would have been awkward. And messy. My doctor assured me it's totally normal and will increase more until I deliver her. In her words..."it's all misery from here." Grrrreat! Though I had already assumed that given the sciatic nerve pain, charley horses, stiffness, exhaustion, and inability to sleep for longer than 2-3 hours at a time....
We are getting so excited to meet her!!! And I say her because we still have not settled on a name yet. I have this sneaking suspicion she will be born and we will be looking at her trying to figure out what name she looks like....
And that's what is new in a nutshell. Exciting I know. Like I said, I am stinking at blogging right now.

Show and Tell

Brian has his first show and tell at school on Friday. The note from his teacher said that each child should bring in "a few things" to share. Not real descriptive, doesn't really help much. I was thinking of sending an ultrasound picture of his baby sister on the way (the 3D one where you can tell you are looking at a head and a face), a picture of his family-as he is obsessed with talking about everyone who is his family, and a favorite book. I mean what does one send with a 3 year old for their first show and tell? If I ask Brian without some ideas to give him, he will go in with his Handy Manny talking toybox (loud and obnoxious and sure to drive his teachers mad), his Little Einstein rocket (again, volume/sanity factor), or something loud and absolutely inconvenient and unrealistic to take (like the television). Tonight I asked him an open-ended question re: what he would like to bring and he said the Christmas tree. So that kind of questioning is clearly not going to work.

Hormonal vent, feel free to skip

I know that I have officially entered my third trimester. I am back to being tired, and I am over-analyzing everything in the way only a hormone over-producing, 25 pounds in 27 weeks gaining, awful skin possessing, and charley horse afflicting, woman can. I am growing terrified at the prospect of having an infant in the house again, and this time with a toddler who has his own schedule and expectations of how much energy mom and dad need to have for him. I am panicked that we won't be able to figure it out...we have our nice little routine and are what I believe to be great parents, to an only child, but do we have enough to share with a new baby? My to-do list before the baby gets here, at home, at work, keeps growing and the deadlines keep getting closer. I barely have the energy to stick to my routine in the day, including getting Brian ready and to school, getting to work, functioning through the day, coming home, figuring out dinner, play, bath, and bedtime. Occasionally I can fit some cleaning in there somewhere....My patience and fuse grow shorter, my effective parenting weaker. I know my energy will only continue to dissipate the closer I get to my due date. And working full-time with 2? How on earth am I going to do this? Am I crazy? And I hate to admit it, but I really feel alone in all of this. Don't get me wrong, Steve is an awesome father, he really is. He is hands-on, recognizes that we both work full-time and have to equally share parenting duties, and is incredibly patient and caring with Brian. He is absolutely everything I could have asked for in the father of my children...and more. It's just this working opposite schedules thing...We have been together nearly 10 years now and have always had opposite schedules. Which makes it a little easier, because we're both used to it. But every once in a while, I get really bitter about it. Enter hormones. Hello bitter (oh and you brought your friend irrational!), nice to see you again...We get two nights a week, one half day, and one full day together. It just starts to wear on you, more of the time you are together seems to be spent coordinating the day/week vs. appreciating the time you have together. It seems you stop expressing your thoughts, fears, daily struggles and triumphs with them, because it's more important to figure out who is taking the kids to school tomorrow, how much we owe for childcare, and what chores need to be completed when. And you don't think about it...until you do, and realize how much you miss them.
And now it's nearly midnight. I have a sink full of dishes (and no dishwasher- curse this historic house), and I need to get everything together for my day tomorrow so I am ready to get up at 6a and out of the house by 7 to sit in a training in Richmond allllllllllllllllllllll day and then a brief meeting following it, meaning I won't get home until after 8p. Thank God it's nearly the weekend....

He definitely has roots in Texas...